Today a friend called for information on Home Care. His father just suffered a heart attack and he was concerned mom would not be able to support dad when he was released from the hospital. The family was also seeking information on local Senior Living Communities, including Assisted Living, Continuing Care and Nursing Home settings.
In many ways, this family is thinking ahead. Not knowing how things may progress for his father, the son wants to be ready with several options once the hospital is ready to release or transfer his parent.
Yet, in other ways, it could be said, the family is a step behind.
As both a parent of young children and a child of aging parents, I am constantly struck by the different approaches we take when it comes to Parent Care vs. Child Care.
With Child Care, we carefully read all the books and manuals long before children are even born. From the time infants arrive we have child-proofed our home, researched and posted lists of emergency numbers next to the extra fire extinguishers and baby monitors. We are prepared for not every, but most, major family emergencies.
With Parent Care, our reaction in an emergency is more often “knee jerk” than pre-planned. We are simply not prepared. We wait for the life event to occur and then we scramble to help manage it.
Part of this trend is due to the fact that our entire society is in a place where it has never been before. It has only been two years since the “Baby Boom” generation started to turn 60 years old. We are just experiencing the leading edge of the “age wave” or “silver tsunami, “ and, as with every stage of the Boomer era, consumer services have yet to catch up with consumer need.
Fortunately, there are a growing number of resources on the market. Most provide advice after a crisis takes place and a few can help you plan ahead. Resources include “The Boomer’s Guide to Aging Parents” and “The Parent Care Conversation.”
Talking with our parents about Late Life decisions can be difficult, but it helps if we are prepare ourselves. It is important to remember though, that our parent s still want to be parents. Try not to make decisions or judgments when gathering information. Depending on the situation, your parents may be fully capable of making decisions themselves, and they have a right to do so. However, when the time comes, it does help if you can provide some detailed options for
- Housing – including locations, levels of care, amenities and pricing
- Home Care- understand both medical and non-medical Home Care services
- Financial Planning – be sure to use qualified financial resources
- Legal issues – Elder Law Attorneys understand many needs of families with aging parents
Additional local resources may be found online through websites such as the United States Elderlocator , Caring.com and MoveSeniors.com.
©RightSized Living®. Excerpt from “RightSized Living: the Guide for Later Lifestyles.” All content has been created by or on behalf of RightSized Living®. No reprint in part or entirety without permission. Full copyright must be included with permissions.
About the author: Nan Hayes has helped countless families with organizing , downsizing and move management. She is the founder of MoveSeniors.com and is dedicated to helping seniors find qualified professional resources to support their home transitions.
Tags: assisted living, Caring For Parents, help parents move, later life, life transition, Nan Hayes, nursing homes, parent care, senior care, senior care facilities, senior living communities
